In the face of rising preteen suicides, we offer warning signs and help resources for parents, teachers, and other child caretakers

September is Suicide Prevention Month, a time to increase awareness of this stigmatized and often taboo topic. But while suicide affects people of all ages, it’s the second-leading cause of death of young people ages 10 to 24. Perhaps most startling is that the suicide rate among preteens – children aged 8 to 12 – has increased about 8% each year from 2008 to 2022, for a cumulative total of 2,241 preteen deaths. These troubling statistics are from a recently published study by the National Institute of Mental Health: Suicide in US Preteens Aged 8 to 12 Years, 2001 to 2022

Other study findings:

  • Boys continue to have a higher suicide rate than girls, but suicide among 8-to-12-year-old girls has disproportionally increased in the past 15 years. Since 2008, suicide was the fifth-leading cause of death for girls.
  • While Black preteens had the highest rate of suicide for both time periods, all racial groups experienced increases, including American Indian or Alaska Native, Asian or Pacific Islander, and Hispanic preteens.
  • Firearms figured more prominently in preteen suicides, with the number increasing from 90 between 2001 and 2007 to 440 between 2008 and 2022. Firearms were the second-leading cause of death, following deaths caused by hanging or suffocation.

See more about the study in the Washington Post: Suicide rates in children have continued to climb across 15 years.

The reasons for this rise are complex, involving a number of factors. But aside from why it’s happening, it’s critical for parents, teachers, and those who work around preteens and teens need to learn more about suicide prevention, warning signs to watch for, and steps to take to get children help.

Below is an article that we have previously featured. It was reprinted with permission from Children’s Friend, an excellent central-MA based nonprofit with a mission of “improving the lives of children and those who love them.” It offers Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), a specialized outpatient program for adolescents who are at high risk of self-harm or suicide, and many of the teens in the program have histories of serious suicide attempts. Dr. Jennifer Denaro was asked why a young person would try to end his or her life. Here’s what she said.

WHAT PARENTS NEED TO KNOW ABOUT TEEN SUICIDE

 “Most teenagers whom I have talked to after a suicide attempt report that they were feeling very depressed or felt that they couldn’t tolerate an overwhelming event that happened, and they were trying to escape the situation or get relief from their feelings. Most kids who try to kill themselves don’t want to die. They don’t think about death as permanent and seem to be trying to escape feelings such as sadness, hurt, shame or loss. They often don’t know what else to do about these painful emotions and feel completely overpowered by them. These emotions take over and result in impulsive behavior. Some teenagers also act because they feel unwanted and unloved.”

How sad that young people with so much life ahead of them are in such despair. Most of the kids who take their own lives are probably loved, even if they don’t feel they are. The brain of a child or teen isn’t fully developed. What is clear and logical to you as a parent may not occur to a young person, so it’s important not to ignore signs of trouble.

Dr. Denaro put together the following list of behaviors and warning signs that should put you on alert:

  • Changes in eating habits
  • Changes in sleeping patterns
  • Social withdrawal (avoiding friends and family)
  • Dramatic mood swings (seems happy one minute, full of rage the next)
  • Increased irritability
  • Alcohol or drug abuse
  • Loss of interest in school
  • Decrease in grades
  • Loss of pleasure in previously enjoyed activities
  • Persistent boredom
  • Sense of hopelessness or guilt
  • Increased conflicts with peers
  • Unusual interest in death/dying
  • Writing poems, stories about death
  • Listening to music about death
  • Obsessing about the suicide of a famous person

Warning signs of more immediate risk. Take prompt action, if a young person:

  • Talks about committing suicide
  • Put affairs in order (for example, saying, “If something happens to me….”)
  • Makes comments that suggest that he or she has been considering suicide (for example, says things like “I won’t be a problem anymore…,” “I’d be better off dead…,” or “It’s no use…”)
  • Gives away favorite belongings
  • Writes a will
  • Writes a suicide note
  • Appears cheerful and at peace after a depressive period or
  • Shows signs of psychosis (for example, hearing voices, bizarre thoughts), then it’s time to ACT.

What should a parent do?

  • First of all, take any comments about suicide or suggestions about suicide very seriously.
  • If your child shows warning signs, acknowledge his or her feelings and provide reassurance and love.
  • Listen carefully to what your child is saying to you.
  • Remind your child that even when things are overwhelming, they can and will get better.
  • Let the child know you want to help.
  • Don’t be afraid to ask the hard questions, including, “Are you thinking about killing yourself?”
  • Ask about his or her suicide plans.
  • Get an appointment with a professional, licensed counselor in your area immediately.

If your teenager seems in immediate danger, get to the emergency room at once, even if it means calling 911.

Professional help can make all the difference. Let’s keep our kids safe.

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